In this song he is singing about his Grandmother. Only fitting that last night my wife found a bunch of old letters my Grandmother sent me back in 2005. You see, they moved down to Florida in the late 90s and I really never was in great financial shape to make nearly as many trips down there as I would have liked. So Grandma would write me letters about every two months or so. They always started by her saying she was up way before my Grandfather and had a few minutes before she had to start breakfast. Then it would go into the weather, the cats, and how the family was down there. Same format every letter, but comforting none the less.
Well, as it goes Grandma got sick and had to be put in a nursing home because my Grandfather couldn't take care of her himself. I could only imagine how hard it was for him to make that decision. It was just around Christmas time 2007 that MaryJayne and I had gone down to Miami for a little vacation. We planned to drive across the state and visit the whole family for Christmas. On the day we were leaving Miami, my mother called and told me they had to rush my Grandmother to the hospital. That was the longest four hour drive I had ever taken. When we arrived at the hospital my mother had warned me that when I went to the room, Grandma may not recognize me as she is slowly forgetting things. Wouldn't you know, she recognized me immediately and promptly told me to take my hat off... good ole Grandma wasn't done yet! As it turns out she lasted quite a few years after that but she was never the same. The last time we saw her she was not the same person I remember growing up. It was sad to see the confusion when my mom had to explain to her who I was. But the one laugh we all got was when she knew exactly who MaryJayne was. Saying goodbye that day was hard. I guess way down deep, I knew it was for the last time.
I got the call from my mom one spring evening in 2010 that Grandma had passed away. I cried like a baby for hours after. It was a sense of loss I have never experienced in my life. Someone I had known since birth was gone. I was 1000 miles away from that whole side of the family and I could donly imagine how my mom was feeling. I eventually went down there about a month later after coordinating with all my cousins so we could all be there at the same time. It was a bitter sweet reunion to say the least.
So I'm reading these letters last night and all I could do is smile. I was holding in my hands a piece of my history. I could hear her voice in every line, all of her little phrases. How after god knows how many years of marriage she still loved my Grandfather and would tell me how he would sit outside and "watch the world go by". I could hear her laugh when she would write about the crazy antics the cats were up to that day. And she would sign off every letter with "Love and prayers, Grandma".
I guess what I'm trying to get at with writing this all down is hold on to all those memories. The people may be gone but they are still alive as long as you are. Jesus I sound like a million cheesy songs but it's true. I'm so happy we held onto them.
I've been feeling pretty down today. Not sure why, just one of those days. I'm gonna go read those letters again. Remind myself what life is all about. Well I hope you enjoyed my return to writing this here thing, even if it was a bit depressing. Just remember to love each other, and remember all the good times. Looking back at this whole thing..... Man have I turned into an Emo douche in my recent years. Hahaha.
